Rainey Parker

Finding and spreading joy through coaching

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A big part of why Rainey Parker became a success coach was to provide learners with a level of support that she herself didn’t get — but would have loved — in college. As she tells the learners she works with, “I cannot tell you what to do, but I love to listen and learn about what it is you would like to do — and then encourage you to do that.” Along with her incredible listening skills, Coach Rainey leans on her InsideTrack training and her instincts which, time and time again, have proven to be a winning combination. “You put the two together and it’s like, oh, this would be so awesome for this learner! Affecting the learner in a positive way that brings forward motion to their lives is inspiring, and the results that come from it are pretty incredible.” 

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Rainey has found that she also relies heavily on empathy. “Even though we may not experience 100% what someone else is experiencing, we have all had experiences in our lives that may help us understand where a learner is coming from.” Noting that empathy is a building block for equity and inclusion, she uses each interaction as a way to create a safe space for that learner. “I do my best to make it a non-judgment zone so that the students can truly tell me what their desires are, what their dreams are, what their challenges are, and then we can work through them together.”

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Lessons learned from training

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Being an InsideTrack coach has taught Rainey how to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. Rainey admits that, before her training, she carried certain expectations into conversations — expectations she didn’t know she had. Now she listens without expectations, seeing it as an opportunity to learn more. “InsideTrack has helped me be more creative and realize that something unexpected in a conversation is not actually uncomfortable.” She puts this into practice by asking questions that she doesn’t know the answer to, finding that she gets more sincere answers when she stays away from “why” questions. “How” and “what” questions open the door to more illuminating conversations. 

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Rainey particularly enjoys using these types of questions on learners who appear to be on the quiet side. “When I ask a question and all of a sudden they open up and start talking, those are moments of joy for me.” She knows from experience that asking the right question can help someone who seems shy feel comfortable enough to share their story or ambitions or dreams. “It’s like a gift, it’s so awesome.”

Lessons learned from students

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This coach is so inspired by her learners that hearing about their accomplishments and the steps they took to achieve them pushes Rainey herself to do better: “When you motivate someone, they end up motivating you. You’re trying to provide a service for them, but really they’re providing a service back to you. It’s a two-way street.”

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Rainey loves thinking back on all the amazing moments that have come up during her coaching sessions. She recalls a struggling learner who opened up about a challenging relationship that was negatively affecting her life and progress in school. The learner trusted Rainey enough to share her truth and the steps she took to make a change. Before they could move on to another topic, Rainey paused the conversation to reflect back all of the changes and choices this student was making to improve her life. “All of a sudden, she started to cry and said, ‘Thank you so much. No one's ever talked to me like this. And I never really looked at it this way before.’ Starting with that safe place and listening then reflecting is so powerful. And what makes it so powerful is because it's her strength, it's her choices, it's her work…. This is why I love coaching.”  

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“Coaching is awesome. Truly awesome. The reason why is because every time it's a brand new experience. It's never the same. It always looks different, but the outcomes are awesome, and that's what makes it great. I just love it. It's always new, always different, always changing.”

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A coach for life

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Even when she’s not coaching learners in her daily work, Rainey finds that she simply can’t stop coaching. Whether she's dancing, going to a rugby game, eating at a restaurant, braiding someone's hair or attending a concert, she finds that whenever she is around people, she is interested in learning what their goals, dreams and ambitions are. “I'm going to try my best to make connections with people and ask sincere questions. Anytime I'm with someone, I'm going to build some sort of relationship or friendship.”